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Surviving Football Season Like a Boss


If you're anything like me, it happens like this.

It's summer. Life is wonderful. It's warm, and you play outside, and your husband is always in a good mood because his team is neither winning or losing because they aren't in season. It's great. It's beautiful.

And then, faster than a speeding ticket, your life is consumed - CONSUMED - by colorful jerseys, and mad dashes home from (insert event here) because "The Game" is about to start (which one? I swear "The Game" was last week. I'm so lost.) and in approximately 3.5 hours or 4 if there's overtime your better half will either be elated and or sulking, followed by reading ESPN's recap and asking what you thought about the Reverse Flea Flicker that altered the entire course of the game in the 3rd quarter. This will repeat several times a week for about 5 months and by the end of it you will start involuntarily dry heaving when you hear the words, "football" or "bowl game".

A fact for many a marriage is this: most men like football. They love football. They played it, and now they watch it, and silently will their team on from the comfortable sidelines of the couch. We don't have to understand it - we can expect balance - but we do need to accept it. Much like he probably accepts your watching of DWTS/The Bachelor/New Girl.

It was a huge source of conflict for the first several years of our marriage. We'll be open and honest - many of our arguments stemmed from my intolerance of it and absolute disinterest in hearing about anything remotely related to football, and his wanting to share a passion with me.

Enter Fantasy Football.

I know. You already have enough apps on your phone but I am TELLING you this will change your life. Ask yourself the following questions:


  • Are you competitive? Like, at all?
  • Do you enjoy a friendly rivalry with your spouse/family/friends?
  • Do you enjoy the camaraderie associated with participating in a group of people who just want to beat each other in a weekly competition?
  • Do you want to make your husband happy?
  • Does increased marital harmony during football season sound at all appealing to you?
If you answered "yes" to at least one, but preferably more - then, my friend. Fantasy Football is for you.

For the past 4 years, we've been on Fantasy Leagues together - either composed of his friends and colleagues or our family and family's friends and I've got to tell you. There IS something about willing a team to win when you've got your hubris on the line. There's something magical about going head-to-head with your spouse a few times a season - and women who don't care about any team in particular tend to win. And your husband? He's going to brag to all his friends and coworkers that his wife plays Fantasy Football - making you the coolest of all of the wives - and he will legitimately be proud every time you beat his team.

Our quality of life increased about a bajillion times after we figured this out. He gets to share something that is important to him with me, I occasionally get to beat him, we have a good laugh and steal each others waiver wire picks... you get the picture.

Next year, give it a try. Come back. Tell me what happened.

As for me? I just knocked my sweetheart into the consolation bracket for the 3rd year running. #sorryimawinnerbabe

Below, you will see that I won handily with a score of 147.7. VICTORY. Sweet, sweet victory.




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