It wasn't until my son was about 3 months old that I realized exactly how addicted I was to my cell phone. Once he started becoming more alert and active, it became super apparent how compulsively I opened my phone to check Facebook, Instagram, email, or any other number of apps. I've never been one for games, but those can be totally distracting too.
I made it my mission to break that addiction - I didn't want my son looking up at me, trying to get my attention, only to see me staring at my phone. The behaviors and habits we exhibit will be absorbed by our children. If I didn't want him to worship screen time or feel the need to constantly be entertained, then I certainly couldn't model that to him. Don't get me wrong - I'm not perfect at this by any means, but I have come a long ways and figured out several tips to keep my cell phone from running my life. Try one or two and see how much it changes yours!
Get Rid of Social Media
This might sound extreme, but one good way to identify exactly how often/how much you are looking at Facebook/Insta/Twitter/Snapchat/whatever the latest is, is to go completely cold turkey.
You will be shocked. (Or not. Recent research indicates that the average person checks their phone 190 times a day. A day.)
There are a few ways to do this - completely delete your profiles, go on a "fast" for a week, remove the apps from your phone, whatever. I deleted Facebook for almost a year and a half and it was awesome - I freed up more time than I care to admit and spent zero time arguing online with people I'd never met. I've also gone on a fast for Instagram, and that has been eye-opening too.
Here's an everything-in-moderation approach: turn off the notifications for your social media apps. I've found that when I don't have my phone buzzing, flashing a message, or waving a red notification in my face I'm much less likely to open the app and get sucked in.
Leave It On The Charger
If my phone isn't on me, I'm not compelled to look at it and I can't reach for it out of impulse. One thing I do every day is leave my phone on another level of the house, or on the charger, for hours at a time. This ensures that I'm able to give my son some quality time and attention, get some work done, and be a little less distracted generally. I also almost always have it left on silent which poses a significant issue when I lose it, but it lets me check everything on my own time without being audibly bombarded all day long.
Get Physical
And not in the way you're thinking. Get a physical calendar. A lot of people utilize their phone or Google calendars for just about everything simply because as a society we almost always have our phone. Automation can make life easier, but it can also open the door for you to get distracted every time a notification or alert pops up.
There are so many super cute and customizeable planners and calendars that you are bound to find one that suits your life - whether you need it for work, for home life, or just because you really like to plan your day from start to finish. My personal favorite (I have one for home, and one for work) is the Happy Planner. They've got a huge assortment of expansion packs, different inserts, stickers, etc if that's your thing. I originally had wanted to do cute planning but found it way more functional to simply write in it. Here's some other fun options: Erin Condren, Lily Pulitzer, and MomAgenda.
Besides - the simple act of writing something down has been proven to help you remember and internalize information. If you're anything like me, you could use all the memory help you can get!
Don't Start Your Day With Your Phone
Be more intentional with how you start your day - don't just reach over and start scrolling. Many of us sleep with our phones on our nightstands, and beyond all the studies showing why that's a bad idea, there's so many better things to do than look at your Facebook feed first thing in the morning. I promise, not much has happened since you looked at it right before falling asleep anyways and you know I'm not wrong. Get up, listen to a podcast while you spend 15 minutes getting yourself ready, prep something for dinner, get caught up on your work emails - anything but your phone. It'll get you on a productive roll that will set the pace and tone of your day.
Forget About FOMO
Seriously. We are in such a habit of taking pictures of and recording every little thing that sometimes we forget that it's okay to just experience a moment, too. Rather than trying to stage and snap the perfect shot, take in every detail of that one moment with all of your other senses: the way your baby feels snuggled up to your chest, the sound of your kid laughing (literally nothing like it in the world), exactly how at peace you are. Don't get me wrong - there's something to be said for an occasional candid photo that can bring a favorite memory right back to life. But it's also true that oftentimes, we lose out on so much of an actual experience when trying to get it perfectly recorded.
Give it a try! Our kids deserve the best of us - and we can't give that to them when we're halfheartedly throw crackers in their general direction while watching the millionth Insta-story of the day.
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